I've known too many Spaniels

One of the greatest fights ever was the duel between the man in black and Inigo Montoya at the top of the Cliff's of Insanity. They used Bonetti's defense, which was appropriate considering the rocky terrain. Thibault could cancel out the Capa Ferro attack. The opponent used his Agripa. It was a mighty duel. They both used their best moves and artistry in the sword fight. They dodged and parried and thrust and dodged some more. They both dueled left handed, a deception move used until they needed to switch to their right and stronger hand, which changed the direction of the battle twice.

The conversation that takes place right before the fight, as Inigo who is just waiting around to kill the man in black meanwhile assisting him is a wonderful display of honesty and mutual respect. The dialog during the battle is the same, each dueler complimenting the other while attacking with blades.

The man in black bested the Spaniard. Why? He was better. He wore down his opponent. He knew when to strike and when to sit back.

Lauren and the kids have bested me. They wore me down. They knew when to strike and when to sit back. I waited at the top of the Cliff's of Insanity to shoot down their requests to get a new dog. Our conversations were honest and showed mutual respect.

"I promise to take her for walks." Max would say smiling his semi-toothed smile.

I used Bonetti's defense. No, was my answer.

"I will feed the dog." Wyatt would say and bat his long brown eyelashes.

I have studdied my Agrippa. No.

Lauren called me last week. She was at the SPCA. She wanted to tell me about Lilly, the Spaniel mix, she had just found and fell in love with.

"No." I said.

"Why?"

"I have known too many Spaniels."

Lauren sent me a picture, which was equivalent to admitting she was not left handed.

We picked her up on Saturday. This is Lily.




Lauren and I want to change her name. Lily is one of my favorite names. We know a few Lilys. And each of them is beautiful and radiant. But they are people. Lily the dog is a beaut and radiant and full of life. But she is a dog. I don't want to, I don't know, disrespect or confuse the two. We are thinking of name for our new dog.

Any suggestions?

Anybody Want A Peanut?

My mom hosts a Christmas Eve gathering/open house at her place for a gift exchange between the various aunts, uncles, nieces, nephews, Godparents and Godchildren. This past Christmas the party started at 1pm. Right before we were leaving the mailman dropped off a package addressed to me. I quickly opened it to find an advanced copy of Brad Meltzer's latest book The Inner Circle (which does not hit book stores until 1-11-11). I was quite excited since Brad Meltzer is my secret man crush author.

I took this picture in front of my Abe Lincoln portrait because The Inner Circle is about the (fictional) U.S. President's secret Inner Circle (not Abe's inner circle but you know he was a president so I figured it made sense). I also tried to get the "Bra Melt" part of Brad Meltzer's name. I plan to write a review of Brad's book later this week. Let me just tell you, so far, awesome.

While at my mom's house my Goddaughter Allyson, my brother Anonymous'/Kevin's daughter, gave me what I consider to be one of my favorite Christmas gifts ever.

That's right, she gave me a Westley and a Fezzik doll from the movie the Princess Bride. If you squeeze their bellies they say lines from the movie including "Anybody want a peanut?". I didn't know these dolls existed. I was even more excited about getting the dolls than the book.

My wife, Lauren, on the other hand is slightly disappointed. She is upset that I was more excited about the book and the dolls than I was for any of the gifts she gave to me. I think it may also have to do with the fact that every night since Christmas Eve Westley, Fezzik and Brad Meltzer's book have been in our bed.

MLT

Twelve years ago I met Lauren. Twelve years ago was our first date.

Twelve years ago I fell in love. I am still falling.

She is better than a nice MLT- a mutton lettuce and tomato sandwich where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe...they're so perky. I love that.
Also twelve years ago I used Just For Men on my goatee.