Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Getting Old.

The girl at the checkout counter kept looking over my right shoulder as she scanned my items at the Comp USA store. When I looked at her she quickly turned her eyes back to the register. She did this a few times. Not looking at me but not really looking past me either.

The last time her eyes drifted to my right shoulder I made a big display of looking at her and then looking over my shoulder. She blushed, knowing she was caught.

She gave me a nervous laugh and said "I'm sorry sir. You just have a fuzzy on your ear."

"Oh." I said as I reached up to grab it away. "It must be from this sweatshirt. Thanks."

I brushed my hand against my ear. I pulled my hand away but there was nothing there.

"It's still there.", she said.

I reached up and grabbed the top of my ear. Using my thumb and forefinger I gently pinched the edge of my ear and I slid my hand down towards my earlobe. I felt the fuzzy in my grasp and I pulled it away from my ear. As I pulled I could feel the skin on my ear get tight. I stopped pulling.

"You didn't get it." She said.

My face became beet red. I reached up again and pulled at the fuzzy. As I pulled my hand away I could feel my entire ear being pulled from the side of my head. The checkout girl's face contorted and she grimmaced as if she just bit into something really sour.

I was even more embarrassed. What she thought was fuzzy was actually a really long, really grey piece of ear hair. Still attached to my ear.

I did not know what to say. She did not know what to say. We were silent for the rest of the transaction.

35 comments:

K said...

DOH! heeheehee...I try to keep Murphy's ear hair in check. ;o)

Loth said...

Ouch! That must rank up there with asking a non-pregnant woman when she is due!

Anonymous said...

Yea, but did she give you the Senior Discount?

Nilbo said...

Nice trade, huh? We lose the hair on top of our head (well, some of us do) and gain it in bushier ear and nose crops. Thank you, God.

(sigh) And women think they have it so bad with women's ... stuff. Whiners.

OK, running away now.

Teri said...

those hairs sneak up on you all the time.

Anonymous said...

Oh.Well.hmmm..awkward.

OhTheJoys said...

Once when K and I were on a bus in India the driver had turned the tables on this one. He had grown a thick crop out of each ear so long that it curled around his whole ear like the arms on sunglasses. K and I could NOT stop staring at him. He had a handlebar mustache too. He was a site to behold. You could emulate him.

Effie said...

I give my hubby's ears the once-over before he leaves the house--to prevent that from happening...nothing worse than a stray-strangely placed hair!

Meegs said...

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA *deep breath* HAHAHAHAHA

Sorry, but that is hysterical. Completely awkward, but totally amusing.

MP said...

OMG....that is hysterical...

Anonymous said...

I have them on my chin. Why not YOU on your ear! Very funny! Momo9

Heather said...

My husband will not pluck long hairs growing on his ears until he show them to me. He knows how much I get a kick out of them. Now that's love.
http://3boysundermyroof.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Someone needs to ask Santa for a nose/ear hair trimmer. Oh please! You know they are growing out your nose too. Do you have the wild eyebrow ones yet?

Anonymous said...

Thank, you, thank you! I needed a good belly laugh today. (Ear laugh?)

Gina Coggio said...

OH MY GOD. LAUGHING SO HARD.

Anonymous said...

Amazing someone so goodlooking(last post) with hair all together, could fall for someone not so much with hair all not together.

Ern said...

OMG, I'm blushing just sitting here at my desk and reading this!

Chris H said...

Quick, go find the tweezers mate! Stew pulls his out too...yik.

Anonymous said...

I don't mean to laugh, but that's damn funny.

Amber said...

Yes, but do you have long nipple hair? It seems to me that is the thing men let go. Who wants to be able to braid nipple hair? Ear hair? That's easy.

Anonymous said...

that's kinda gross (i absolutely cannot relate, nosireebob!).

eclectic said...

I betcha if they'd had tweezers right there at the checkstand, she could have sold you a pair!

Anonymous said...

Oh Bill. I am so sorry. Those first signs of old age are hard to take. Was the check out girl young and pretty? Oh dear. At least it wasn't a really long nose hair!

Heather said...

After being tagged, I have tagged you (forgive me). Read about it here and decide if you want to participate:

http://3boysundermyroof.blogspot.com/2007/11/8-random-things-about-me.html

BOSSY said...

Too bad Queer Eye is out of business.

Anonymous said...

And you KNOW she's gonna be talking about this forEVer.

Chris Cactus said...

That ain't right. At all. Because it's something that would happen to me.

Anonymous said...

ha ha. You old fart Meaks. That makes me giggle. Thanks for the cheer today. I needed a smile.

Beth Fish said...

Dude. You may as well break out the black socks and sandals, because that's where you are headed now.

theotherbear said...

Hahahahahahaha.

Anonymous said...

Oh. My. I'm laughing so hard I'm crying! I've been a lurker, but just had to comment. Too funny!

Anonymous said...

Ouch!

Male ego took a shot. It stinks getting old.

This is why I check every morning for stray hairs popping out from where they are not supposed to be.

All the best,

Art

Deb said...

Oh... my.

The Dad Diaries said...

I get so much fluff on my ear that if i stand in front of a light it looks like i have small angels wings coming out of my head.

Meamo said...

lol lol lol this is so funny, I'm stealing this story and making it my own.