Average Parents

When you think of youth sports, what is the first thing that pops into your mind? Is it over-zealous soccer moms? Coaches yelling at kids? Dads barking from the sidelines?

Too often the stories about youth sports that appear on the Internet, via news, blogs orFacebook, are about the "politics"of the leagues, bad coaches or bad parents. Stories about fathers assaulting coaches, coaches being too tough on kids, rants about unfair leagues and the "politics" of selecting teams litter the Internet. I understand negative stories are what piques people interests, makes good copy, and sells click-through ad space. I also understand that these stories are the rarity to youth sports.

Every now and then a great heart-warming story about youth sports will go viral, like this one or this one, but again, these stories are rare. These are the extraordinary, positive stories that make good press.

Both the negative stories and the positive stories are the outliers to what is normal in youth sports. I really shouldn't limit this to just sports though. The same could be said for schools, teachers, clubs, and other group activities. We, who absorb the content of the media and Internet, are only really exposed to the extreme stories. We never hear of or read the average stories. I know, I know, "average" does not make good print.

Currently, I am on my fourth stint as a coach in a youth sports league.  I have to say that I have yet to see anything that fits into the extreme, good or bad, in any of my dealings. So far my experience has been average. Every practice or game I see average parents bring their average kids to an average team, to average coaches to play an average game. I watch as average volunteers take time out of their average days to work the average concession stand as other average parents rake and prepare average fields. I listen as average people cheer for average plays, as average coaches give average instructions.

When I stop to think about it I realize that it is the average that is truly exceptional. The average mom who makes sure her kid is at practice on time is doing an exceptional job. The average dad who cheers on another kid for making a play is setting an exceptional example. The average parent who offers rides to and from games for other kids is making exceptional sacrifices. The average parent who gets involved and stays involved, is building an exceptional foundation for their kid as well as others.

We remember to thank the coaches but we, or at least I, always forget to thank all the other exceptionally average people who make youth sports (or clubs) such an exceptional experience.

Photo courtesy of an average parent doing exceptional things

My wife Lauren said to me a while ago, "This is the time when our kids may be forming the bonds of life- long friendships. We need to make sure they are surrounded by the type of people, the type of kids, we want them be friends with 15 years from now."

I think it starts with the kid's parents. Right now my kids are surrounded by a lot of average people and I think it is exceptional.

How to Play Second Base

In order to play the position of 2nd base on a baseball team one must first dress the part. A ball cap, a glove, cleats and eye black are all the important parts of the 2nd baseman's uniform and equipment. Most important is the eye black. A second baseman has to look good.

A second baseman must be quick on his feet and ready to move at the crack of the bat. He should position himself between the first base bag and the second base bag for optimum visibility

It is in this gap between bases, along the edge of the infield grass, that the best bugs and dirt are found. Playing second base requires the ability to identify each bug and then determine whether it gets set free or squashed.

A second basemen also needs to have excellent hearing so he can hear his father/coach yell directions to him from the outfield. The standard baseball direction terms usually are "pay attention","look alive", "eye on the ball" and "holy cow how many times do I have to tell you to get up off the ground".

Once a ball is hit a second baseman's first moves should be towards the ball. His momentum should either direct him to a bag to cover, or to the ball itself to make a play.

Sometimes that momentum and the ability to throw the ball to the right bag results in the batter being called out. The OUT results in the coach/father to smile, run in from the outfield to give his son/player a congratulatory five.

While on offense a second baseman is also required to bat. In the event of a hit the second baseman should run as fast as he can to the base. Sometimes fast is not fast enough and the second baseman will be called out.

Being called out usually makes a second baseman sad, but that is okay, as long as long as he looks good.

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We just finished our Little League season. I had a good time coaching and I think Maxfield had a good time playing. I am looking forward to coaching Wyatt next year.

All photographs were taken and copyrighted by Sharon Monaco and used with permission of the photographer.

Supporting Characters

I was recently asked by the publisher Little Brown and Co to review the book The House that Ruth Built by Robert Weintraub. I read the quick blurb about the book "A new stadium, The First Yankees Championship and the Redemption of 1923". I was pretty up front with my response to editor about how I was a slow reader and that I was not a Yankees fan but that I wouldn't mind taking a look. I like history. I did not know too much about the history of Babe Ruth or the Yankees and I figured I may get an education.

Weintraub weaves a very interesting story about Babe Ruth, the NY Giants Coach and anti-Yankee man John McGraw, the Yankees' owners Ruppert and Huston and the building of Yankee's Stadium. The first few chapters read more like historical fiction than a typical baseball book filled with statistics and assumed knowledge of players. Weintraub does a nice job dropping in enough modern day references like Rocky Balboa or more modern landscape references that gives the reader (me) a better visualisation than say your customary black and white photo reference.

I think that The House that Ruth Built does an excellent job at providing details, like the quantity of bolts used for Yankee Stadium, but without making the book too statistical. Everyone and everything in the book is described with personality. At one point I found myself reading as if the stadium itself was an actual character in the story. Which is understandable since every ball player in that era had a nickname that sounded like a serial killer, like "Sultan of Swat",  "Jumpin Joe", "Bootnose" or "Gink".

More importantly than the detail and descriptions Weintraub does an incredible job of bringing to life the secondary personalities and lesser know characters from that era. He gives meaning and punch and purpose to construction workers, sportswriters, coaches, players and other influences to the story and the life of Ruth and theYankees.

And that right there is what makes this book such a great read. The lesser known or forgotten personalities are part of the mix. If the book were fiction these people would be considered supporting characters. But they weren't characters, they were people. People with minor influence but influence non the less.

Hearing a heartbreaking love song after a breakup gives that song much more impact. Seeing a funny movie at the right time or with the right people makes the movie that much more funny. Reading a book and liking it or feeling good about it , I believe, much like hearing a song or seeing a movie is all about the timing. Reading The House that Ruth Built is perfect in it's timing for me.

This year I am again coaching Maxfield in his Little League team. Is the next Babe Ruth on my team? Who knows. But I am aware (even more so now because I am reading this book) of all the secondary and minor influences that are happening now. If a book is written about Cole or Zach or Shamus or Nick or Billy or the other handful of kids on the team, will I be mentioned? And if so, will it be in a good way or a bad way? Was I the coach that did too much or too little? Will Maxfield be an influence on a future great player? Will he himself be a great player?

So as I read the House that Ruth Built I read every character and every name and I quickly think of the other coaches, players and other volunteers I know who give meaning and punch and purpose to the kids playing on my team. It makes Weintraub's book that much better.

I hope someday a book is written where I get a mention. I just hope it is not a book about a serial killer.

Sudoku

Saturday was Maxfield's official first day of playing organized sports. It also marked my first day of coaching an actual game. Part of managing a team at this level is making sure that every kid gets equal playing time at every position and each kid gets to bat in a different spot in the line up throughout the season. One way to make sure this happens is to have the kids play a different position each inning. 10 kids, 10 positions, no repeats. Setting my line up for a three inning game is like playing Sudoku.

Our team name is the Pirates, Lauren made sure that we had fans to support us.


It was a cold and windy Saturday and Jackson came to the game dressed as Captain Snotbeard the Pirate. That is stylish snot goatee.


Lauren also made us a banner for the opening day ceremonies parade. No other team had a banner. Pirates rock.

Maxfield played first base for one inning. He is one handsome first basemen. It was good day.

We have another game on Wednesday so I may be busy for the next few days trying to figure out which kid plays where.

I suck at Sudoku.

Lucky Numbers

I started playing organized sports at about the same time I found out I was evil because I was left handed. When my T-ball coach, while handing out our uniforms, asked me what number I wanted to be, I told him thirteen. I explained that I was an evil lefty, who was born on 666 and my favorite color was black and that 13 would be a perfect number for me. My dad just shook his head and handed me the number thirteen jersey. I was a very Goth-y eight year old.

Number 13 has stuck with me ever since. Sure, I was on certain teams where I could not be #13, but for the most part, when I got to pick what number I wanted, I always went with thirteen. My second choice was 6 due to the whole 666 thing.

I am coaching Maxfield's T-ball team. One of the perks of being the coach is that Maxfield gets first choice on his number. I asked what was his favorite number and he said 2068. I then asked him what number would he want between 1 and 10 and he picked 9. Not that Max knows this but #9 was his Godfather's favorite number. Nine is a good number.

Tonight I am handing out the other kid's jerseys and I am a little nervous. I may be handing out numbers that will stick with these kids for life. I may be doing something that could affect them for years to come.

I know, I know you are thinking what is the big deal? It is just a number, right? Well I think differently. My favorite number,thirteen, that I picked when I was eight years old, it is a 1 and a 3. One and three are now very important numbers in my life. Lauren's birthday is March 10th, a three and a one. We were married on the 13th of the month. Max, my first born, was born March 1st, another 3 and 1.

See where I am going with this? Take the unlucky number 13 and flip it and it becomes significant in some of the most lucky things that have ever happened to me.

So tonight, when I give out these numbers to these little kids, am I going to be determining when, or where, or how their life is going to change?

Handing out their numbers is probably one of the most important things I am going to do as a coach. Right after explaining the importance of a jock strap and protective cup.

What is your lucky number? Does it have significance in your life?