Wednesday, August 01, 2007


I know that Maxfield is only 3, well 3 years and 5 months to be exact, but I am starting to become concerned about his future education. He is already showing signs that he may not do very well in school. I am trying to come to terms with the fact that he may not get an academic scholarship. I don’t know how he will get good grades in basic elementary school classes.

Take Math for instance. He knows his numbers. He can count but when it comes to simple addition and subtraction he seems to just not get it as evidenced by this very common conversation in our house.

“Dad, can I have a cookie?”

“Sure Max. But just one.”

He reaches into the cookie jar and pulls out two Oreos and places one in each hand.

“Max, I said just one.”

“I only have one.” He says holding up his left hand.

“No you have two.” I say pointing to his right hand.

“No I only have one.” He says holding up his right hand. “And I only have one here.” Again with the left hand held up.

“But Max, one plus one equals two, and I said you could only have one.”

“NO! I only have one here and one here. That is only one.”

He is having trouble with basic math, so I was thinking that maybe he will excel in English class. But then I started to think what English consists of, Reading Comprehension, Sentence Structure. Punctuation, Grammar, and I know I suck at these, so he does not have much hope.

Take Reading Comprehension for example. I have to read the same book to him 4 or 5 times a night.

“….and the little red caboose saved the train. The end.”

“Read it again Daddy.”

“But I just read it. Let’s read another book.”

“No. Read Little Read Caboose again.”

I don’t think he comprehends the story.

His English and Math skills are lacking, maybe he will take an interest in History. History is not so much about remembering dates but more about learning about how events have shaped us as mankind. Dates are important because, what has happened before, shapes the future. I don’t think Max understands this.

“Daddy can I play with my trains?”

“Sure. Where are they?”

“Mommy took them away.”


“Because I hit Wyatt.”

“Well then no you cannot play with your trains.”


“Because you have to learn not to hit Wyatt.”

“But that was before. I want to play with my trains now.”

I don’t think he gets history.

I think I am going to have to start working on his athletic abilities in hopes of him getting a scholarship.


SciFi Dad said...

That? Was awesome.

Excellent post.

Charlotta-love said...

lol...I hope the athletic lessons go better. VERY funny post!

eclectic said...

Hey, a cookie in each hand is my idea of a balanced diet. Maybe he'll be a dietician or something!

Shelley said...

Sounds like maybe he has a future career as a lawyer??

Patience said...

I think he could get a job with the IRS. Pity.

Anonymous said...

On the constrary, he's a genius! If I only had thought of those things when I was a kid!

Teri said...

I think the poor kid is doomed!

he seems very "literal" brained.

Amber said...

I agree with Sheri. My first thought was that he is a genius. I don't know, I'm not there but I'm just sayin' I would start checking his room for blue-prints, ski masks, black gloves, walkie-talkies...your basic genius spy stuff. Any 3 year old that can rationalize that one cookie in each hand still counts as one cookie, is running a completely different game than his peers. My your back!

Unknown said...

Maybe he'll be a politician. :)

I never liked history either. I mean, why bother learning something "old" that's only gonna repeat itself anyway?

Anonymous said...

That was great! I agree with Shelley - future lawyer. Watch out when he starts bargaining for a car!

Anonymous said...

I also vote genius - I love his math.

Anonymous said...

Don't worry, it sounds as if he has a great future career in the diplomatic corps, [as long as it's not politics]

Anonymous said...

Wow, what a perfect post for us other fathers. I need to look at my soon to be 4 yr old and see where he lacks/excels.

Anonymous said...

I was thinking lawyer too. With cookie logic like that, he'll be at the top of his law school class.

Carrie said...

I was going to type a comment about the athletics, and Maxfield being a "playah" with his ability to get things, then I realized just how very white I am, and how very stupid that would be written out.... ESPECIALLY coming from my stepford-residing ass.

see? case in point.

I DO, however, think his cookie logic will win him MUCH favor from the ladies. or at least from me. cause lord knows I love me some cookies.

Anonymous said...

Must agree. Max is brilliant!

Nature Girl said...

I don't think you have to worry...he sounds like a genious to me! One cookie in each hand...that's awsome!

Nature Girl said...

I don't think you have to worry...he sounds like a genious to me! One cookie in each hand...that's awsome!

BOSSY said...

Bossy thinks maybe he's just advanced in New Math concepts.

Chris H said...

Ha ha ah, the kids is a genius!!!

Amy @ Taste Like Crazy said...

Sounds like a normal three year old to me. :)

Nilbo said...

I'm not sure I get the problem. He had only one cookie. That was the cookie in his left hand. And he had only one cookie. That was the cookie in his right hand. One cookie, each time. One times one equals one. Everybody knows that. Geez. Sounds like his DAD needs help in math.

Now, maybe he can help you and me figure out why TKW is always TALKING about her white ass, but never showing it. Now, THAT, my friend, would be a genius.

Jody said...

Brenna "reads" Little Red Caboose to us now...

But I understand your point... And must concur...

Kami said...

You crack me up.

Anonymous said...

It sounds like genius to me!

M&Co. at MyOwnCircleOfConfusion

Lois Lane said...

Admit it, you are jealous because he is CLEARLY smarter than you!
Have a great weekend.

P.S. Cool photos!

Anonymous said...

His oreo math is like your Scotch math.

latt├ęgirl said...

LAWYER was my first thought.