Thursday, January 25, 2007

Inconvenient Truth

I have been, somewhat, against potty training Maxfield. Not that I don’t want him to be able to go on the toilet, but more so as a convenience to us, his parents. As of right now, if we want to go and do something it is simple; we slap a fresh diaper on him and we go.

Once he is trained in the fine art of using the toilet, however, there is no going back. Whenever we want to leave the house there will be a 15 to 20 minute ritual of convincing him that he has to go to the bathroom, even if he doesn’t have to go. This could be inconvenient. There will be the quick trips to the supermarket, that, will turn into long trips, because once we are in the canned goods aisle he will decide he has to go potty and I will have to actually take him to the restroom so he doesn’t backtrack in the whole training regimen. Again inconvenient.

But since he approaching the age of three we need to train him. I am kind of looking at this, as I am the Master Jedi training my young protégé. I am Opee One Canpoopey.

The other aspect of potty training that I do not like is admitting to the fact that my son is getting older. That he is no longer a baby. He is a boy. Part of me, the more "sensitive, I am such a wuss" part of me, does not like admitting this. He is growing up. I have to come to terms with that fact and I guess I have to teach him the proper ways to use his "light saber".

Lauren called me the other day to tell me that she went out and bought some items to entice him to use the toilet. The items are:

“Big Boy Underwear”- to make him think he can actually use the toilet and diapers are for babies.
“Cheetos” as a reward for when he stays dry.
And “Reeces Pieces” as a reward for when actually uses the potty.

My response was. “Cheetos? AND Reece’s Pieces as rewards? I don’t even get that and I stay dry all the time and I hit the toilet 95% of the time.”


Anonymous said...

I am sure Lauren would dispute the accuracy of your 95%.

Anonymous said...

You spend all that time training him and he will eventually turn out like Uncle Mike or Uncle Pat deucing in Easter Bonnets and wiping with socks.

Anonymous said...

I also noticed that you avoided the third reward. I can't believe those Batman underoos still fit you.

Effie said...

maybe if you let Lauren know that you stayed dry all day you'll get some cheetos tonight!

Anonymous said...

I have absolutely no experience in potty training boys but I've heard that a ping pong ball in the loo can work more wonders than all the cheetos in the world... Good luck anyway, may the Force be with you. :)

Anonymous said...

Just imagine what a trip to the bookstore will be like!

I was surprised you didn't mention that since that's one of his favorite places to um, you know.

JP said...

May the schwartz be with you.....

ToadyJoe said...

You've just GOT to check out the Cottonelle (I think) TP for KIDS! It's adorable! Little blue pawprints that you 'follow' as you pull the TP off, and when you've got the 'right' amount of TP in your hand you find a DOGGIE! That's your sign to rip off the TP and use it. It's so kids don't use too much TP.

I bought a pack for my 23 year old brother, who's notorious for clogging toilets, lol!

Yes, I'm mean. But think of the advantages if you teach a kid from the very beginning, the right amount to use. :)

Susie said...

It's true, diapers (and Depends) are more convenient.
Tell Lauren you'll get that other 5% if she offers the right rewards.
And I want some of Toady Joe's toilet paper.

Anonymous said...

I don't know anything about potty training boys, but I heard you were supposed to throw a few Cheerios into the toilet so that he could perfect his aim. ;)
Or maybe it was froot loops. OR other action figures in cereal shapes! I hope his light sabre knocks 'em out.

As far as the holdup in waiting for him when you need to leave the house...May the force be with him when he has to "go!"

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Opee One Canpoopey?

"Your shorts have a light side and a dark side... and if you piddle in them, the light side turns dark... and no one wants that..."

kimmyk said...

Good luck. I've found that boys are better at potty training.

Just tell Max he can pee off the porch and all the other cool things you boys can do once you get the hang of it.

Some though, never do.

eclectic said...

Floating targets only work if he's tall enough to stand, and focused enough to not get distracted. If he's sitting with the sabre point down, the floatees don't work. But, it really saves on the bathroom scrubbing to have the boys sit for the first few weeks. Believe me, you DON'T want an unattended light-saber flying around like a fire-hose, especially if he's standing! Find a "Flip-N-Flush" -- it attaches right to the toilet and is SO much easier and less gross than a potty chair.

t-bird said...

The big boy underwear was my first attempt. They were Superman design and he was very impressed. We immediately went and changed him out of his diaper into the Superman underwear because he liked them so much. I was so proud that I had come up with such a great idea. We kept reminding him that he couldn't potty in his big boy underwear, he had to tell us that he needed to go potty. Around the ten minute mark, and after about our 5th reminder about going to the potty, he was ready to put his diaper back on. Big bummer.

I think Lauren's more comprehensive plan with rewards may work better.

We have graduated to 'Feel N Learn' Pampers and making it to the potty about 70% of the time with stickers as rewards.

OhTheJoys said...

Next time you poop on the potty just yell to your wife, "I POOPED ON THE POTTY PLEASE BRING ME A REESE'S PIECE!!!"

Stepping Over the Junk said...

I finally had to bite it and just carry a change of clothes for my kids around and LOTS of wipes and got rid of the diapers (when I thought they were ready) when we ventured out. I have to say, I never forced them to go if they said they didn't have to because with each of them, we had experiences of going for a walk, them refusing to go to the bathroom, having an accident about 8 blocks from home and having to walk home in pee soaked clothes. Once did the trick. Of course, if they DO go potty beforehand and have an accident, that's a different story.

NOTHING enticed my kids unfortunately, I tried M&Ms and I ended up eating them all. My older one somehow thought she would get one even if she peed on the floor

Nature Girl said...

ROFL! This blog is going to have some interesting stories (more than usual that is) in the weeks coming....this is going to be fun. My boys always liked to turn the blue water green....(2000 flushes blue in the tank)
Worked great..

Anonymous said...

Only a suggestion but you might want to look at the book,"Potty Train Your Child in Just One Day: Proven Secrets of the Potty Pro" [toilet training] by Teri Crane. This method worked for my grandson (he is 3 and beautiful er..handsome). My daughter will also use it for the second grandson (he is 2 & also beautiful). Many parents rave about how easy it was to potty train their children using this book as a guide. Good luck.

Thank you for the opportunity to read your blog. Keep up the good writing. I can't wait to read the P&B blog each day. Thanks for the laughs, sharing your beautiful children, and Lauren (she is amazing too)!

Anonymous said...

Opee One Canpoopey?

That's precious. Good luck with the training.

Denise B. said...

Please keep posting about the potty training!! Our son is roughly 2 1/2 years old and its "3 days until no diapers, right Isaac?" "Right, mommy." We start Monday. I have training pants, plastic pants, pull ups, potty chairs, a folding potty seat for traveling (Wal-Mart), I need to get treats still. I'm thinking fruit snacks.

I am curious to see your son does.

MrsDoF said...

The fact of children growing up really hits a parent in the heart. Seems like just as ya get the rhythm of one stage, he's ready to stroll into the next.

Potty-training took many handfuls of cereal floating in the toilet for my sons. And at least one wet-down-the-leg walk across a chilly parking lot for the middle one.
I do remember they were dry all day before they went to Kindergarten.

When the oldest was in Second Grade, he would jog home from school, drop his backpack in the middle of the kitchen, then rush into the bathroom.
It seemed he needed the peace and quiet of the 'home pot' to be able to do Number 2.

My sons are grown beyond college, and go to the clinic on their own when they need medical care.
Talk about growing up too fast.

You and your missus are a team, good with communication.
Your younguns are lucky, and will do just fine.

Anonymous said...

I just LOVE this! My child is going to potty train his son! The Circle of Life! What a joy! Can't wait to hear how this goes. Children always do get trained. It is a challenge, but it turns out okay in the end. We never put cheerios in the toilet. Aim was not as important as being in the bathroom and trying to get it in the toilet. If they missed, I didn't care. Just a little extra clean up than usual. Just so they tried. PATIENCE is the key! Good luck! Have a smile on my face again!

Anonymous said...

That's why William is in the 95% region.

Anonymous said...

Toss a few Cheerios into the toilet and let him fire away. That's what we did.

Anonymous said...

Oh the joys. My youngest, a girl, resisted, the training despite many enticements. Then 1 night, at the age of 2 years and 8 months, the wife (That's the daughters age my,wife is like 15 or 16 years older than that)said, start using the potty and when you are trained your get a trip to WDW. She was dry that night, and never used diapers again. She gamed us for the trip! But it was worth it.
You might have to offer a trip to meet George Lucas as WDW is ho-hum in your neck of the world

MrsDoF said...

So I'm reading the 25 comments here and thinking "Wow, I sure didn't have this much support when my kids were learning where, when, and how!"
Then I went over to Dooce and see 878 comments about the same subject.

Whooee, am I glad for my empty nest these days!