Pets

My patience and tolerance of our pets has been waning. They are really starting to frustrate me. Yes I know they are pets and they do things that pets do but I am really getting to the point where their unconditional love and “friendship” and all the other benefits of having pets is no longer outweighing the negatives.

I feed the cats. I feed the dog. I walk the dog three times a day. I clean the litter boxes. At the end of every night I gather the cats and lock them in the garage so they won’t disturb us. I let them out in the morning. I am constantly stepping over the cats and dog while walking through my house.

A month ago I spent a Saturday afternoon steam cleaning our carpets. Within 2 hours Bogart the cat gets a dingle-berry stuck to his ass and scoots his backside across the carpet. Basically he used the carpet as toilet paper.

Luna, our dog, in desperate need of attention is constantly nudging her way between Maxfield and I whenever we are playing on the floor. She gets so excited and wags her butt in our faces, until we stop playing.

My in-laws are in town for a few days and I was discussing with them the all of the stuff that annoys me regarding our pets. My In-laws love pets. I tried to convince them to take the animals back to Pennsylvania with them. I thought I made a good case. I offered my Father-in-law the dog in exchange of my Mother-in-law.

My Mother-in-Law laughed and thought it was a great idea because she would get to see her grandkids all the time. I thought it was great idea because I would not have to walk her or feed her. She could babysit the kids and Lauren and I could go out. I only gave her one rule: She was not allowed to shake her butt in my face.