Monday, February 19, 2007

T.P.

When I food shop, I always buy the cheapest brand of whatever I need. There are a few exceptions, like Dorito's, none of their competitors have been able to even come close to matching their delicious crispy crunchy cheesiness. But for the most part I have learned to quickly break down the cost by unit (oz., piece, lb., slice of beef jerkey per bag, whatever) and I buy the cheapest.

My method works, pretty much, perfectly for all of the aisles in the store except one; the Toilet Paper aisle. Man, this is the most confusing aisle in the whole store. First of all, I hear all kinds of talk on the news about people complaining to congress and their senators about the price of oil and gasoline, but has anyone ever stopped to take a look at the price of toilet paper these days? It's unbelievable. Not only is it expensive, it is also difficult to break down the unit price. They have "regular rolls", "giant rolls" and "big rolls" and that is just for the standard Charmin with the red packaging. How am I supposed to break down the unit price for that to comparitive shop?

The other thing I noticed about the toilet paper is that, at least in the Publix I shop at, all the different brands are priced pretty much exactly the same. A 12 pack of Charmin is the same price as a 12 pack of Cottonelle. Is there some type of OPEC like organziation that runs the toilet paper industry where they control prices so there is no free market?

23 comments:

MyBestInvest said...

You hit the nail on the head on Doritos and tp. The tp aisle is a confusing wasteland of different sizes, packaging and pricing.

Which is a better deal: 8 rolls for $3.99 or 6 megarolls for $3.49? I don't know. I just know that buying stuff to rub on my, you know, shouldn't be so confusing.

One thing is for certain: going cheap on tp is a huge mistake. You wind up with 30 rolls of the John Wayne toilet paper that has the texture of mulch.

Oh, The Joys said...

It really drives home the idea that consumer choice is not equivalent to "freedom". Go, fight, win Home of the Brave!

bad dad said...

Seriously, the only paper you should buy is the cheapest. Cause that is the only paper a Cheap Ass should use.

Anonymous said...

Some people blame monkey butt on the TP. Quality matters. If you find a brand that works, pay the ferryman.

Anonymous said...

I know that some people use the TP like the Indians used the buffalo. Don't waste any part of it. The Tp gets used for what it was made for, facial tissue, with windex to wipe the TV off and when it is out, the roll holder gets used as a way to smoke the piece pipe.

MetroDad said...

I'm so frugal that I have been known, on occasion, to steal toilet paper from public restrooms. Those prices are insane!

momo9 said...

William, don't STUDY it, just buy it! We don't have an alternative! Even though Dad is against paper products in general, (plates, cups, napkins) He says "it's like throwing money in the trash". He agrees we need t.p. Just so it gets the job done. We're a Scott family here. Hard on the hiney, but seems to stay on the roll longer. The softer ones go quickly. What are we doing talking about toilet paper?

Kami said...

Buying Scott TP is grounds for divorce. Just sayin'.

Get Charmin or Angel Soft.

Circus Kelli said...

Is there some type of OPEC like organziation that runs the toilet paper industry where they control prices so there is no free market?

Yes, there is an organization that controls the prices so there is no free market for T.P. It's called TPEC.

And now that you know about us, we must erase your memory...

The Kept Woman said...

Dude. I totally hear you.

There's always different amounts of sheets on the rolls too...even if they are both called "double rolls" the amount varies from brand to brand.

I hate this. I know I get screwed every time I buy TP.

eclectic said...

Circus Kelli just made me laugh out loud!

We shop at Costco, and buy the Kirkland Signature t.p. by the 48-pack. It's soft like Northern, but cheap like Scott. I win.

Effies said...

we get the "no name" brand from our grocery store--maybe that brand is only a Canadian thing, but in our cupboards, you'll see the yellow "no name" plastered on almost every product or "President's Choice"--they're cheaper and the quality is mostly there...on the mayonnaise, it must be Hellman's, and the mustard must been Keen's...

Laura said...

Have you tried the Publix "super soft" store brand tp? I buy that one all the time, a little cheaper than the other stuff and works great.

Don't confuse it with their "green wise" tp that is too rough and falls apart.

I can't get over the Tp prices, and cat litter prices are just as bad. 7.99 for a box that lasts a week!

Redhead Mommy said...

There are somethings that you cannot go cheapo on. In our house, TP is one, but so are peanut butter (skippy natural), cheetos, and Saran Wrap. We tried going cheap on that, but everytime we use the cheapo stuff, we end up using bad words, too.

teri said...

they have the soft Scott tissue if anyone is interested. I'm a Scott girl myself.

sarahgrace said...

I just buy the stuff that feels like you're wiping your rear with clouds and try not to think about it twice. (I buy it at my local Sam's Club too...so I think that helps a bit with the price...)

platypus said...

I think the only brand you've mentioned that I've heard of is Charmin! You are right though, it's insane. It's just under £4 for a 12 roll pack of ordinary enough stuff so that's about $7.80! That sounds like we're paying more than you! Sigh, now I'll have to get my sister to bring THAT back from her trips to NY as well!

Stepping Over the Junk said...

It appears to be the same for toothpaste. drives me nuts.

Mainline Mom said...

Yes, every quarter Proctor and Gamble hold secret meetings with Kimberly Clark to set the price. Also they determine who gets to put their coupons in the paper on which weeks.

Just whatever you do, don't be Scott. Your ass will be sorry.

Lucy's Mom said...

We pee a LOT at my house. Too many women. We use Scott because otherwise the roll is gone in 5 minutes. Scott may be less soft and puffy than Charmin, but the fact that it lasts 4 times longer on the roll makes up for it. I guess I have a tough ass. The Scott doesn't bother me.

Sudiegirl said...

Actually, six megarolls are the better deal because they last as long as eight regular rolls.

Also, it's good to find a coupon.

I haven't been back here in a while...my bad...I shall endeavor to do better.

Smooches!

sometrouble said...

I was going to say what "mmybestinvest" said...should you buy the 12 regular rolls or the 8 giant rolls for the same price??? My mom always bought Scott...my husband's butt is spoiled by Charmin. So that is what I am commanded to buy...and now I'm spoiled too.

American cheese singles must always be KRAFT...the rest are just not the same. If you're gonna eat plastic cheese, you might as well get the best quality plastic!

kalki said...

The word 'Publix' makes me giggle like I'm in middle school or something.