Thursday, September 08, 2005

Will Power

We were driving out of the Waterford Lakes shopping center the other day. This shopping center is the size of a small city.

“Just because there is ice cream in the freezer, does not mean you HAVE to eat it.”

“But, Lauren, that is what it is there for.”

“Not at 2 o’clock in the morning.”

“I can’t help it.”

“You just need to have will power Bill. Will power.”

Just then, in front of us, a silver car started to back out of a spot to our right. Lauren gives a friendly honk of the horn just to let the person know we are there. The silver car backs completely out of the spot so the driver, looking through her passenger side window could make a face at us. We could have totally T-boned the silver car. The silver car driver raises her hands in disgust and yells something at us. She then pulls back into the spot. Apparently she was just straightening her car out.

Lauren pulls up to the spot and opens my window.

The silver car lady gets out of her car and yells. “WHAT!”

Lauren leans over me and says to the lady, “You were yelling at us. I was wondering what you were so mad at.”

The silver car lady raises her hands above her head, “What! I was just straightening the car out. Why do you have to honk at me? Calm down.”

Lauren, does a double take, looks at me, looks at the lady and says, “YOU calm down. I was just letting you know I was here. You don’t have to be so angry. I was being nice. You backed out in front of me.”

“I know what I was doing. You don’t have to honk.” The silver car lady did the whole talk to the hand thing as she walked away.

I turned to Lauren smiling, “Wow. You never are confrontational. What made you say something?”

“The fact that she is screaming at me, when she was clearly in the wrong. I can’t stand it when people are like that.”

“Yeah, but you were so calm. You weren’t mad. You didn’t yell. I was shocked that you even said something.”

“I was surprised you didn’t say something Bill. Usually, you are always telling me to be more confrontational.”

“ I was just going to call her a whore, but I didn’t. How was that for will power?”

17 comments:

kimmyk said...

it's a start..good job.

Tammy said...

That's great will power. That would have been the first word out of my mouth.

What a wierdo.

Cat said...

Hee. I can SO relate to the conversation before the confrontation. The more important confrontation, in my book, actually. You know. About the ice cream? And willpower? HELLO?! TGIM?! WILLPOWER?! You, TOO, WILLIAM! Apparently! SHEESH!

I admire the restraint you showed in keeping "whore" to yourself. Dude. Harsh. I would think "Psycho Biznitch" to be WAY more appropriate for the situation...

LizzieDaisy said...

I think I'd pay good money to hear my hubby call someone a whore. Or even an idiot. Course it'd be his money but that's beside the point. And kudos to Lauren. Wow I wish I could do that.

Ice cream at 2am... sounds like a plan.

Susie said...

The age-old dilemma: friendly inquiry vs. WHORE!!!!

Kami said...

Wow! I remember Waterford Lakes. Cool shopping there!

Nature Girl said...

I wish I could be like Lauren, I just use what little sign language I know, lay on the horn to make sure they see the sign language and move on. Cursing all the way of course. I have no willpower either....I can't even wait till 2 a.m.! Stacie

Effie said...

Go Lauren--way to put that lady in her place!

And Bill-I'm impressed at the restraint you managed...

Random and Odd said...

I love you two!!

Lois Lane said...

LOL! Good for Lauren and good for you using Will Power. It's like the Force.
Have a great weekend!
Lois Lane

Anonymous said...

orlando drivers are like that! i worked at the papa johns on alafaya and 50, and if you are coming from the walmart area on 50 and need to get into the papa johns parking lot, you have to take a u turn at the light.

well, i would have a green arrow, and the people going from alafaya to 50 had a red right turn light, they would skip it, almost hit me taking a LEGAL u turn, and they would flick ME off...

the nerve... gotta love those otown drivers :)

Unknown said...

Hehe...that's funny.

Unknown said...

Well done, Lauren.

eclectic said...

Flashbacks of Orlando traffic. Gaaaaaaah! Bad manners seemed to be the rule, not the exception. Lauren just won many, many points in my book of people, and you? Well, you're just too dammit funny not to win some points as well.

Kari said...

Ian just about sprayed his ice cream all over the living room as I read this to him from our lap top...whore! he would have done the same. LOL you guys with your will power ways...

Mama Duck said...

Funny.

You and my hubby are apparently twins separated at birth.

Cannot. Leave. Pie. Alone. Must. Eat. For. Breakfast. Lunch. And. Dinner. Until. Gone.

I'm not here. said...

Too funny!
Behold, the power of ice cream at two in the morning.
Personally, when I have to hold back my words, it's along the lines of bucking fitch.
Or something like that.