A problem with me being a solid sleeper is my inability to think straight if I wake up in the middle of the night. I have no problems in the morning, if I get five or six hours of sleep, just in the middle of the night. For instance, if Lauren tries to nudge me in the middle of the night to get me to stop snoring our conversation goes something like this:
"Bill, can you roll over?"
"You want an IRA roll over. A 1035 exchange?"
"No. You are snoring. Roll over."
"I love Rolos."
"Bill, no, you are snoring."
"I am not boring."
"How many times?"
"Just once. Okay. Good. Go back to sleep."Lauren, on the other hand, has difficulty sleeping and once she is awake she has a hard time falling back to sleep.
We have not used an alarm clock to wake us up since Max was born. Both Max and Wyatt are early risers. Early like 5 AM early. Most mornings I get up with the kids and I try to let Lauren sleep in a bit. Well, not really sleep in, but more like rest for bit. When Wyatt wakes up for the day I can hear him, over the monitor, jumping in his crib. That is my alarm clock. I can hop right up and go get him and start our morning routine of chit chatting, cuddling, making coffee and preparing his milk.
Some mornings Wyatt asks to see his mom and he snuggles with her for a few minutes before we start the day. Wyatt has been teething recently and has not had a good nights sleep in a while. Last week I heard him jumping in his crib. I jumped up and I went to get him. I was tired and little groggy, which is unusual for me in the morning. Wyatt and I chatted for a bit and I went about with our morning routine. We went downstairs and started to make coffee and milk. Wyatt was really irritable and was asking for his mom. I tried quieting him but it did not work.
From the top of the stairs Lauren called out to me in a loud whisper. "Bill?"
I walked to the bottom of the steps and looked up. "Yeah?"
"What the hell are you doing?" She whispered.
"Making coffee. What's up?"
"It is 1:00 in the morning."
"It. Is. One. O'clock. In. The. Morning."
Dumbfounded I walked into the kitchen and looked at the clock. It was One AM. I carried Wyatt back upstairs and we climbed into bed. I handed Wyatt over to Lauren. She was up now and would not be able to fall asleep for a while. I went right back to snoring.
Like I said, in the middle of the night I am a bit loopy.
The worst part, I have done this three times in the past week.