Thursday, November 29, 2007

Mr. Jones and Me

Mr. Jones is my next-door neighbor. He is probably in his late fifties and he is good natured and an all around nice guy. I have talked to him numerous times and him and I seem to have clicked. He is a good neighbor to have next door.

His garage is converted into a wood shop and he has all kinds of cool tools and gadgets. He keeps himself busy building garden railways, tracks, and trestles out of wood. Last week I needed some precision cuts on a piece wood and I asked him if I could use his table saw.

“No problem.” He said and he offered to do the cuts for me.

As he was lining up his saw and adjusting the height levers we started talking about all of his tools. He was telling me what saw does what and the finer points of changing the thickness of the blade to make more accurate cuts. He talked about a few other tools as well and then he stopped in mid sentence and he said, “But the most important thing a man needs in his garage, above all else, is a good vice.”

And me, being me, could not help myself. I tried. I really did. But I could not stop myself. And I said, “You’re not talking about hookers or drugs are you Mr. Jones?”

He stopped fiddling with the saw and turned towards me with a puzzled look. There was an awkward pause. He pointed over to his workbench at the table vice. Then something in his head clicked and a big smile crept across his face. He shook his head and chuckled.

“I just got that. You’re funny.” He said.

I like Mr. Jones.

24 comments:

Moi said...

I think you would be a hoot as a neighbor.

Even if you do swat at those invisible spiderwebs when you go outside to get the mail.

Rachel said...

LOL! At least he finally got it and appreciated the humor.
My husband has a similar workshop. :-) and he has your sense of humor.

kalki said...

Hee! I like you.

Stacie said...

Ha! It looks like you finally found your match in the sense of humour department..
Stacie

Melinda said...

Sounds like a scene from Home Improvement! I am glad you have a handyman role model who gets your humour!

Ern said...

FINALLY, someone gets your humor. (Besides all of us, anyway.)

Anonymous said...

Did he get the vice in Miami?

Anonymous said...

I love it when you count crows

Teri said...

YAY, someone who appreciates your humor.

See, I would totally get that and laugh. I don't understand why folks don't get you and your humor.

But at least you tried to behave yourself.

The Kept Woman said...

Hilarious.

You just never know how things like that are going to be perceived. Luckily for you men are far more forgiving about those types of things than suburban moms.

Circus Kelli said...

Hmmm... so, he didn't deny the hookers and the drugs, did he? Interesting...

Meegs said...

Lol... it's good that he got it, otherwise that could have been awkward! :-)

charlotta-love said...

I test strangers all the time to see if they get my humor. I love it when they do. When they don't, I have a little laugh to myself - which is even better sometimes.

Glad he caught on.

charlotta-love said...

I test strangers all the time to see if they get my humor. I love it when they do. When they don't, I have a little laugh to myself - which is even better sometimes.

Glad he caught on.

No_Newz said...

He's right, you are funny. I guess Mr. Lane is one of the cool guys now. Besides hookers and drgus, he also has a table vice in his garage.

Have a great weekend!

Effie said...

it's a good thing he DID get it...

;)

kittenpie said...

OMG you have found your people. This could be scary!

shari said...

A little slow, perhaps... but there's hope for him that with more exposure, he'll get quicker on the uptake. ;) That was a GREAT line, and there's NO WAY anyone who had thought of it could have resisted saying it -- it's too perfect an opportunity!

Patience said...

I like Mr. Jones too!

Scarlett Wanna Be said...

I like Mr. Jones too!!! He sounds like one of those great ol' guys I would want to take home with me...not that I would ever take them home with me...but sometimes I want to.

Whit said...

Not that there is anything wrong with drugs or hookers in the shop...

decrepitoldfool said...

I have three shop vises - one for woodworking, one for metals, one for fine assembly. And I have some personal vices as well, of which one is the inability to resist snickering at homonyms which are also double-entendres.

Anonymous said...

I think that the commenter called you a Homonym.

creative-type dad said...

So there was a hooker on the table...