Thursday, January 12, 2006

Love is a Battlefield

Occasionally Lauren says things to me like, “Hey Bill? Did you notice that all of your contact lens stuff has put itself away everyday this week.” OR “Bill the Dryer Lint Fairy stopped by and took care of the dryer lint that you let pile up on the dryer.”

Sometimes I am inclined to respond with, “Yeah? Well did YOU notice that my toenail clippings were on the nightstand for only three days and not four?” And I realize that I am not going to win the argument.

23 comments:

Suzanne said...

Thank goodness! Kevin and I may be normal after all!!

kalki said...

Normally I don't play clean-up fairy at our house - I'll just leave Rob's messes until he cleans them up. But a few days ago I did clean up after him because I was so disgusted and didn't want the mess around any longer. Guess what it was...yeah, TOENAIL CLIPPINGS on the nightstand. Eeeew.

Susie said...

This is eerily similar to my homelife. :0

TBG said...

Nope wont win that argument.

I like the lint fairy! Ha too funny!

Tammy said...

I have to tell mine all the time: "You see that little box in the wall? If you put the dishes in it, it will wash them for you. The trick is, you have to put the dishes in them first. I know, there's always a catch."

So, I feel for her! :)

Kami said...

You guys are all the same.

(Shaking head)

Hugs to Lauren.

Circus Kelli said...

My husband has magic socks. After he takes them off, rolls them into a ball and throws on the floor, they wash themselves, fold themselves, and end up back in his drawer.

ieatcrayonz said...

Why not just throw them on the carpet until the vacuum fairy finds them?

Be warned, she's a bitch when she finds them, or steps on one, or puts them in your food as payback.

No_Newz said...

Wow Bill! You have a house fairy just like my husband thinks we have! Amamzing. ;)
Have a great weekend!
Lois Lane

Candace said...

In our house, *I'm* the one the clean-up fairy visits.

kimmyk said...

*heavy sigh*

must be in the man handbook to not pick up.

Stacie said...

eeewww! just...eeewww! Go hug your wife right now and tell her how wonderful she is!
Stacie
go on...whatcha waitin' for?

SoozieQ said...

Hmm, the nightstand huh? Ick.

Thankfully the Hubs would NEVER do that, no siree bob. Instead he "pretends" to cut them over the toilet. I say "pretends" because I normally find at least 10 daggar sharp nail knives scattered around the toilet. There ain't no fairy willing to pick up toenail clippings near pee dribbles on the floor. I'm the eff'g fairy, dammit!!!

Yah go hug your wife now and tell her how sexy she looks in the pajamas your Mom gave her. NOW! RUN!!

mrtl said...

That toe nail fairy is always below the curve.

lehighmary said...

Toenail stuff, it must be a guy thing because Casey does that, too, and YUCK!!!
But contact lens solution? During highschool, I realized that I was going to be using it twice a day (morning and night), so what was the point of hiding it away in the cabinet? I leave it out, and I like it that way.

judypatooote said...

You just make me laugh.....

Football Widow said...

Ew. Toenail clippings. I don't blame her for leaving those there!

eclectic said...

Mr. Eclectic must be in the minority. He's forever patient with me neglecting to do little maintenance things, and ends up doing them himself. In my defense, however, I ALWAYS notice that he's done them, and am grateful and appreciative.

Cat said...

Ooooh! This totally reminds me of the suitcase episode of Everybody Loves Raymond when Ray and Debra returned from a romantic getaway and someone left the suitcase on the stairs and both of them passive-aggressively ignored it, waiting for the other one to put it away, and neither did, and finally Ray noticed that Debra was wearing a shirt that used to be in the suitcase and he freaked out and it was totally HILARIOUS because TGIM and I have totally done the same kind of thing but not with a suitcase because we never get to go on any romantic getaways, but still?!

And yes, I realize how pathetic it is that I can relate almost any life story to a sitcom episode I've seen on television.

*sigh*

(But it was WICKED FUNNY, yo?)

Susie said...

What IS IT with men and the toenail clippings!? Gross! Dan does this THING with leaving a can two feet from the recycling box. TWO FEET AWAY. The Pillow Smother Fairy may not be far away.

Jeff said...

We get visits from the Dryer Lint Fairy here as well, but for some reason, she only has to come after my wife does the laundry. We also get daily visits from the vacuum fairy while my wife is at work. The dishwasher fairy shows up every now and then to empty ours, usually before my wife wakes up.
Sorry..... I had to defend the guys (at least myself) a little.

LotionBarBunny said...

My husband doesn't know that there is a "dirty clothes fairy" that puts his dirty clothes INTO the hamper and not next to it. ;)

Janet said...

Your site has a Campbell's soup design. I love soup. Therefore I must love your site.

That's how brainwashing works, right?

Congrats on your nomination!