Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Extended Family

Over the past few weeks I have had five nieces/nephews make their First Holy Communion. I have attended each of their parties celebrating the event. When attending these types of large family parties I always seem to forget that extended family will be there. The extended family I refer to is the In-laws to my brother(s) hosting the party. Their mother and father in-law, various brother and sister in-laws, nieces and nephews and aunts and uncles that are of no direct relation to me are in attendance. I always seem to forget their names and I know, for the most part, they forget mine. I always seem to get a little bit of social anxiety in these situations.

The last time most of Extended In-laws and I met were at the wedding of the mutual family member.

Since I have 7 brothers, at these big parties I sometimes get, "Which one are you? You were so funny at the wedding when you guys roasted (insert brothers name)." Or maybe they say "Bill? Or is it Dan, right? Were you the one that said that -Bulson push-shove thing/The groom's got big balls./The groom has three nipples./Joan thinks we are getting naked- at (insert brother's name) wedding?"

I then introduce myself and have to admit that I don't remember most of my brother's weddings and that most likely I did not say any of those things. It usually ends with an awkward moment of me not remembering the Extended In-law's name and I take a long extended sip from my beer in the hopes that my silence forces them to say something else.

Anyway at these recent parties, over the past few weeks, I decided to take a different angle to those Extended In-law conversations. I now admit to saying those things at the wedding. I then say the most off-the-wall somewhat offensive comment I can think of and then introduce myself as Kevin.

It has been working great. My brother Jim's, John's and Dan's In-laws all think Kevin is a little strange.

16 comments:

WILLIAM said...

I will admit to "dickball beats them all."

r said...

LOL! Serves Anon right! Who's Momo9's favorite now? (um, I'm thinking Kevin...).

RzDrms said...

(last comment from me)

kcinnova said...

Brilliant move!

Anonymous said...

I know funny. That is funny.

Kevins Brother

eclectic said...

"LIAR!"


(Sorry. The Princess Bride sneaks out frequently.)

Otter Thomas said...

Nothing like a littel forced socializing. I like your tactics.

Charity Donovan said...

Nothing beats telling a total stranger that you are a male escort when they ask the dreaded "Sooooo, what do you do?" and then blaming it on "Kevin".

teri said...

you have enough siblings that you could make a rotation and blame each of them.

maggie said...

i know hilarious. anonymous is hilarious

kalki said...

Man, I wish I had sisters to blame shit on.

kalki said...

PS - Love the long extended beer sip. I will have to try that the next time I'm in an awkward conversation.

gigglepotamus said...

I think Kevin has a drinking problem...

Dawn said...

Sometime you might care to read what it is like to live in an extended family. I cannot imagine a better way of living, so much love and support all round me.

http://diana-livinginaextendedfamily.blogspot.com/

Alis said...

Sweet!!!! That post cracked me up!

creative breathing said...

This is so you William! I am headed soon to an "extended" party for two graduations and wedding shower all on the same day. Darn, I don't drink beer! If you are a sports fan, then you have seen my son's work. He travels the country doing techie jobs such as the Nascar awards and Heisman Trophy awards on TV. He is the nut that walks on those ladders way in the top of the sports domes! Today's post was great! E