Friday, February 08, 2008

Line Please

Most Barnes and Noble stores, in the children’s section, have a little stage area. They use the stage area for Friday night story time, and crafts, and other events. When the stage is not being used for events, most times, you can find kids playing on or around the stage.

The stage is one of Maxfield’s hangouts whenever we go to Barnes and Noble. Much like his father, Maxfield loves being on stage. He may not have anything to say but he enjoys his time in the center of the stage. Sometimes he dances, sometimes he just talks and sometimes he just jumps up and down. Whether he has an audience or not, he has a great stage presence.

Last week at B&N Max had an audience. Seated at a round table, to the right, were four little girls probably between the ages of 5 and 10 reading princess books and such. Just a few feet away, in a little chair designed for kids, sat their mother. Max bounded onto the stage and spun around. The noise he made caught the attention of the girls and he noticed that the youngest girl was watching him.

Max, motivated by the attention, ran from one side to the other, all the while keeping an eye on the girl to make sure she was watching. He waved to the youngest girl and she waved back. Max giggled and hopped up onto the higher raised platform and from behind a column, played peek-a-boo with the girl. She laughed. The older girls looked up from their books to see what was so funny.

Now he had a larger audience. He leapt down. He spun. He waved his arms. He stopped dead center of the stage. Then, like his father, he seemed to struggle with what to do next. He seemed like he was trying to figure out what his next line was.

Then he smiled at the girls.

And then…then he farted.

He farted loud and long. The girls all started giggling. The mother looked up from her book, unaware of what happened, to shush the girls. They pointed at Max and as the mother’s eyes followed their finger she saw Max smiling back at her.

And as if on cue, now that he had another member of the audience, Max farted again.

31 comments:

  1. OH.MY.GOD.

    It starts really young, doesn't it?

    the girls have NO idea that this will be an ongoing trend and they will eventually be grossed out by it.

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  2. You must be so proud.

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  3. Anonymous10:21 AM

    Please always take your video camera to B&N. For us. :)

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  4. Call me crazy, but I would totally go for a man that has the skills to fart on command. I think it shows commitment and focus and I like that!

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  5. Anonymous11:27 AM

    That's adorable...the only problem is, that once boys/men find something that works, they stay with it the rest of their lives.

    (FYI...It's not so adorable as an adult.)

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  6. Anonymous11:41 AM

    He's a chip off the old block, isn't he?

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  7. When in doubt, make a fart (joke).

    Farts are funny. Farts are funny as hell.

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  8. Anonymous2:05 PM

    Gosh! Imagine having that much bodily control! I'm very impressed.
    Cheers

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  9. THIS is why reality TV is so popular. You just can't write this stuff out of thin air!

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  10. Anonymous2:35 PM

    thin air? we don't know what that is in this household. let's just say, the stage presence isn't the only trait max gets from his father...

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  11. Our boys would get along splendidly!

    As I have learned late in the game since I had girls first, farting and other sounds are key.

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  12. I wish I could fart on demand when I wanted to.

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  13. Anonymous3:47 PM

    I still laugh at farts (as long as I'm not gagging from the stench).

    Sounds like the kid is a natural!!

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  14. I seem to remember that Maxfield had an affinity for pooping in B&N in his early years. I see a pattern here...

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  15. Oh, and this is the second fart post I've read within 4 minutes. Just came from Mrtl's. Pbthhhhhhh!

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  16. Anonymous6:07 PM

    Pull my finger

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  17. Anonymous6:08 PM

    Act II

    Step on a Duck

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  18. Anonymous6:09 PM

    Hey Girls, Is that your mom?

    Tell her to put this in her pipe and smoke it.

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  19. Anonymous6:10 PM

    Wait til Maxfield gets to college and lights them on fire

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  20. Anonymous10:38 PM

    barnes and noble totally makes max regular, doesn't it?! ;) (and p.s., if anonymous is one [or ALL] of your brothers, he[/THEY] are funnnnny!)

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  21. laughing and sharing with my hubby....

    YAY for Max!!!

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  22. Well, at least it's an improvement over the pooping in bookstores thing he had going for awhile, right?

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  23. Well at least he graduated from shitting himself in B&N. LOL! Gotta love Max!!!

    Have a great weekend!

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  24. All you men (boys) seem to be made from the same mold.

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  25. I totally love your son!! What a guy! That is hilarious!

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  26. Anonymous8:48 PM

    Like Grandfather, like Grandson! A chip off the old block. HIS SPIRIT LIVES ON! MOMO9

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  27. This was HYSTERICAL! My sides hurt laughing at it, in part because I just kicked my hubby's butt at tennis and bowling on the Wii, then had to cream two of my sons at baseball and boxing. I am going to get in shape doing this!

    This reminds me of recently when my 21 year old nephew was visiting. He was bent down looking for snacks in the "lazy Susan". My 8 year old son was nearby talking with his cousin and suddenly asked, "What smells like egg salad??"

    My nephew, without skipping a beat just said matter-of-factly, "My bum." He was a total gas bag the entire visit:)

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  28. Anonymous10:53 AM

    What I want to know is what happened next? You made some inappropriate joke, didn't you? Or were you laughing too hard to talk? :)

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  29. Is that how you got Lauren?

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  30. Everyone loves a good fart joke :)


    Bradley
    The Egel Nest

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